drifting through monday

It was my day off today (I have every Monday off) and I decided that as Rebecca was heading off to work at 1pm I'd leave at the same time and go into the City centre. There was no reason to do this I just felt like getting out. I spent a voucher I'd been sent for Christmas and bought the American Slendor DVD which I'd been promising myself for a while (and after watching, and enjoying, Sideways last night it seemed about time to carry through on my promise) A quick trip to a comic shop and I bought By the Numbers, a French graphic novel translated by DC. I don't know much about it other than it's set during 1948 and is illustrated by Stanislas. As Stanislas is the artist responsible for a rather wonderful comic biography of Herge I'm not fussed what it's about, it's look lovely so I'm prepared to take a gamble on the story.
There's something pleasant, even if it's a bit lame in a Gen X/Friends sort of way about sitting in a coffee shop reading a book, so that's what I did. The book was The Outcasts of 19 Schuyler Place by E. L. Konisburg who wrote on of my favourite childrens' books, From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler. So far the book is very lovely indeed and for some strange reason is reminding me of Tales From The City. My attention was occassionally distracted from the book by the couple opposite me who were holding a conversation only really interesting to themselves but who happily broke off several times during it to answer their mobile phones. having only recently bought a mobile phone I'm still amazed at the (lack of) manners attached to the damn things. There was no pause in answerign the phones, one simply stopped talking to the other and answered the phone, no apologies, no recriminations.
On the way back home I passed a woman on a bicycle with her young son on the back, he had his head tilted as far back as it would go and was grining as the wind ruffled his blonde moppet hair. I had to smile.

Perfect Weekend

It seems like it's been months since my wife and I had a couple of days off to ourselves, but then it probably has been months. Sometimes out two rotas just don't fit neatly together and we end up maybe having a day off together once every couple of weeks. Those odd days off for the last few months have been used up for mundane jobs such as food shopping or being spent on a train to see family for a couple of hours before getting back on train then going back to work. But not so for the weekend just gone. Two days off together with no errands and no visiting.
On Saturday we had a nice lie in, slobbed around for a while reading watching the tv and drinking coffee before heading into town for a look round the shops and then going to see Million Dollar Baby (which was excellent) stopping briefly inbetween to eat cookies and drink more coffee. After the film we had a quick drink and then went to a nice veggie restuarant called Squeek, a place where we are always promising ourselves we'll go to more often but still only manage it about twice a year. Instead of getting a bus or taxi home we walked back, it took nearly an hour and was pretty cold but after such a nice day spent doing nothing more than enjoying each others company neither of us wanted to cut it short with a quick trip home.
Sunday was quiet, mostly we sat on the couch doing nothing much, but we did go out for a walk in the park. it was cold but the sky was clear and it just seemed a perfect opportunity to wrap up and go walking. The pond in the park was packed with ducks geese and swans, people were walking their dogs, kid's had kites and we sat in the cafe and shared a twix and had a hot chocolate.
It's likely that when I go to work tomorrow someone will ask if I did much over the weekend, I'll probably say nothing much and it'll be true, but it's been the nicest nothing I've done for a long time.

Update! Wuxtry! Read allaboutit!

It's been a while since I've updated on Simain Smith, now is as good a time as any. Just incase you recently stumbled onto this site (the previous post about my fears for the Hellblazer adaptation seems to prove that it's possible - although I'm beginning to suspect that I just got a comment from someone trawling the net looking for people who don't like Keanu reeves and putting them in their place) Simian Smith is the main character in a book I've been writing aimed at kids around about the 8 years old mark. It's been a rough ride for me and I've learned a lot, but the main thing that I've learned is that I've got a lot to learn. Since I decided that writing might be something I'd like to do I've managed to spend time with other people who'd like to be published. At times it's been inspiring but mainly depressing as they've all been very good and I've just sort of hung around looking up at them with wet puppy dog eyes basking in their glow. Oddly it's only since I was cut off from these people (although happily still in touch with them) that I actually wrote an amount worth a damn. Gone are the ideas for a book never started or never finished to be replaced by Simian Smith Primate Detective. If there's a lesson to be learned from this experience it's to just do it and stop waiting for others to provide the vital spark.
So anyway, a couple of weeks before Christmas I finished the 1st draft. As I said it was a struggle and the sense of pride I got from having completed the book was huge, far bigger than I'd anticipated, so much so that I couldn't wait to get started on the 2nd draft. Real life and common sense slowed me down a little, but as I write this I'm approaching the end of the 2nd draft, it should be finished by the end of the week. One more draft and then it's finished. I intend to do some artwork to go with the book which I'm looking forward to doing, but I'm already wondering what to do next. I've got a few unfinished projects that I'd like to do and after the buzz I got from finishing Simian that first time round I'd really like to do right by them and finish them all up.
Reading through Simian as I've been redoing it I'm not sure what to make of it all, I'm sure it's the same for writers everywhere, but I imagine no one's as unsure as the writer who's hardly written anything. It's not how I imagined it to be but that's as much to do with my original ideas being fairly vague as it is to do with my writing ability. I find myself thinking the next story will be better but instead of making me think the present one isn't worth bothering with it's making me feel that the present one's been invaluable.
And that's where I'm up to, Simian's flawed and imperfect but I'm happy positive and proud, can't say fairer than that.

Late top 10 entries

Okay, this has turned out to be a bit of an albatross. Obviously there's been loads of great things about 2004 but not all of them worth posting. It's not helped by me bunching a load of my favourites together in the first couple of entries, what was I thinking? Danny chose a couple I'd have done and there's no point in repeating them, especially as Danny did a fine job in saying what I would have liked to say if I had the ability to. So, here's the last lot with very little explination cos I just want done with it now.
Number 4 Finishing the first draft od Simian Smith. It was a great feeling, so good I'm not sure I care what becomes of it. Next time I'm struggling with something I'll remember the feeling completion provides and soldier on.
Number 3 Holiday in Amsterdam. Me, my wife, 4 days of being together with no interuptions in a lovely city. Perfect.
Number 2 Green Wing. After the unbelievably brilliant Garth Marenghi's Dark Place the equally brilliant Green Wing took over, everything about this show worked, even though at first I had my doubts. Mark Heap is a comedy god and the only thing wrong with the whole thing was that Channel 4 are getting behind one and not the other. Stop messing around 4 get Dark place out on DVD!
Number 1 Living in our bungalow. Ok, it's not 'ours' we rent it. After putting up with crap houses with neighbours who think we want to hear everything they can hear it's been heaven to come home to peace and quiet. It's not a perfect place, but it doesn't have the paper thin walls that typify the average Nottingham house that has the gall not to be a 10 bedroom giant.

.....and that's it, phew!

hard to sum up

Hopefully you'll understand and apreciate that this post might be a bit difficult and awkward. A bookseller at Waterstones was recently sacked because of his blog. If you're based in the Uk then you've probably heard about it. I work at a bookshop and I have a blog. As far as I'm aware I've never mentioned the name of the shop I work for but I can't imagine it's too hard to figure it out if you wanted to. I have on occassion wrote about crap days at work. The bookseller was sacked because he wrote about crap days at work. I've never read the blog in question and am only going from what I've seen in the Guardian (which also contains samples from the blog) but it does seem that the guy never actually slandered Waterstones, made libelous comments or revealed any practices sales figures or anything of a confidential nature. What he was was critical about the people and things that made his day crappy, occassionally resorting to namecalling. I sound like I'm defending the guy, but one of the reasons I don't mention my employer by name is because it's a whole can of worms I really don't want to risk opening. Being able to speak your mind is important, it's a fundamental right really, but the... let's call it 'freedom of speech' seems to me to require a degree of personal responsibility. Also Waterstones has a freedom to respond.
What I'm saying is that for me there's a grey area of is the guy in the right or in the wrong. There's also my own personal grey area of having a blog and working in a bookshop and not always being happy at work.
What isn't a grey area is the degree of response. Sacking with out warning for something that doesn't seem to be cut and dried seems dodgy to say the least. It's harsh and it opens it's own can of worms. I don't think this is over.

Hideously long and not part of the top 10

There's another 'film of the comic' coming out soon, this one is called Constantine and like many films based on a comic it looks pretty poor. Snotty write ups in film magazines talk about 'geeks' getting their knickers in a twist over the damage being done to 'their' comics and laugh at the silliness of it all. Seeing as the film industry seems intent on sucking dry it's back catalogue with pointless remakes and sequels and stripping classic (and not so classic) books of all their meat and flavour I can't help but wonder if some of these magazine writers should just shut up. Granted there's a certain breed of comic reader who wants to complain about every little alteration of 'their' comic and within and without the comic reading community there's no end of people ready and willing to criticise a film before they've actually seen it (ouch, that comment's hitting a little too close to home!) but what's really galling about some of the changes foisted on many adaptations (particularly, but not exclusively, on comic adaptations) is how arbitatry the changes are and how little they improve upon the originals, lets face they usually turn out to be pretty poor. Having finally seen the Lemony Snicket film I have to say that I was pretty underwhelmed, oh everyone did a great job in (mostly) sticking to the spirit of the books (which is something to be grateful for) but the damage to to the stories themselves was quite severe, packing 3 of the books into one short film and then zipping through the story lines at breakneck speed seemed to strip the books of some of their strengths, detail, incident, characterisation. Not to mention the fact that the voiceover suggested that black macabre humour was not the intention of the books but rather a morose sadness with a slightly uplifting hopefulness clumsily tacked on the end.
Constantine, as the adaptation of 'Hellblazer' is to be called seems to have fallen into the trap of messing too much with what made the originals so good. Gone is the grimy UK setting, gone is the insouciant brit who looks a bit like Sting circa '81, all spiky blonde hair and arrogance. What we now have is Keanu Reeves in New York. I'm not anti-Keanu, he's not a great actor by any stretch of the imagination, but he does well in fun films that require someone to look convincing whilst spouting gibberish against a greenscreen. The real problem with having Keanu is that it pretty much broadcasts the fact that we’re going to have a film that will feature empty gibberish for dialogue and a load of special effects, the iconic look of John Constantine is gone and so will his character, and that was what made Hellblazer worth adapting in the first place.....
Ah, except that's not really true is it. Obviously I'm talking about Hellblazer of about 15 years ago. Back in the mid-80's Alan Moore (who I may have mentioned before) revitalised Swamp Thing into a very fine comic indeed and during his run co-created with Steve Bissette and John Totleben the character John Constantine. As he describes himself early on Constantine is 'a nasty piece of work guv, just ask anyone', and what he did was shake Swamp Thing up as much as Moore did. But Moore never really used him that much, oh he's pretty integral to the plot of the stories he does appear in and the changes he forces the Swamp Thing through are pretty important, but he doesn't actually turn up in many of the comics that and when he does it's not really about him. I love Swamp Thing and I love Constantine in them but where he really comes into play is when DC gave him his one title and asked Jamie Delano to write it. And for about 40 issues that's we he did, and they were (and are, I'm rereading them now) brilliant. Delano is not actually a great writer, his output has been inconsistent but when he gets it right he's well worth following, with Hellblazer he got it right. Delano gave Constantine a past, he portrayed him as been the cocky arrogant upstart that Moore introduced but he added and extra layer of guilt and self doubt to the mix that really made the character shine. Delano's plots of demon yuppies bartering for souls, gaybashing football hooligans sent of to do the devils work, child murders on working class council estates killing through their tedious lives, men who work so hard to create a epic version of themselves they become fiction, dead policemen coming coming back to life as vicious dogs, and so much more were the perfect mix of black humour, weird arcana and honest social commentary of a very real Britain. With artwork by John Ridgway that was rough, detailed, down to earth and realistic the stories were given the best showcase (an excellent artist will do more than just sum up the scripts in pictures, he’ll add to and improve the story with his art, that’s what happened here) and when he left early on he was replaced with other creators who had something to live up to and worked very hard doing just that. Once Delano left the comic floundered, Garth Ennis, who went on to become very popular, crafted some fun but forgettable and less than average tales, Paul Jenkins tried hard but didn’t always manage to pulled it off, Warren Ellis came up with some shallow stories that revelled in nastiness and so it went moving further and further away from the original. Now Constantine seems no older than he did over 15 years ago and just gives mean and meaningful stares, says a few vague enigmatic things and calls people 'mate', 'cos he's streetwise and cool instead of actually have a ‘character’. Some of the stories are fun and entertaining but that’s about it, which is why I rarely dip into them nowadays. Maybe it’s a comic past it’s sell by date, maybe it made more sense back then, maybe everything that was worth saying with it’s been said. Maybe a film staring Keanu Reeves is all it desrves now. I’d still like something more though.

A long delayed entry for number 5

... and it's Oz, probably the finest TV show ever made, certainly the best drama. It make's it into the best of 2004 mainly because I bought it on R1 DVD in Febuary. Oh Channel 4 sneaked it onto TV a couple of weeks ago, but that doesn't count. After recieving excellent reviews, and pretty decent rating IIRC, Channal 4 in it's ultimate wisdom started showing later series at later times and didn't even bother advertising that the 2nd series was even coming on. This terrible treatment denegerated to the point the series 5 was shown at 3 in the morning in December and Channel 4 even forgot to advertise that 3 episodes were running back to back to back, so viewers who set their VCR's for 2 episodes (like us) actually missed a middle episode of the series. After looking at the TV guide Rebecca and I realised that an episode was missing but could find no sign of it on Teletext. On Channel 4's forum they apparently offer a very half hearted apology. Still, instead of attacking Channel 4 for appalling scheduling, failing to promote a great show and squeezing an entire series into a week at some Godforsaken time of the morning, I shall tell you a little about the show. Oz is short for Oswald Maximum Penitentiary and follows the day to day lives of the inmates. This is not a worthy show, this is a hard hitting, blackly funny, shockingly violent unflinching soap opera of a ride. Any show that features one of the characters getting head from another guy and then breaking the neck when he comes is worth a look as far as I'm concerned. But it's not all naked men, rape, grisly death and violence, Oz is so compelling because it never lets you forget that these men are not very nice (everyone is OZ is guilty, even the one's who really don't deserve to be there) and yet still makes you care for them. You may hate a character but when he meets his end (and there's a seriously high mortality rate in OZ) it'll be so horrible that you'll wonder if he really deserved what he got. One of the other great things about OZ is that it changes, and that's why it reminds me of a soap. Most dramas feature characters that slowly develop with occassional serious changes if something drastic happens to them. In Oz, by it's very nature, people go through radical changes because something drastic is happening to them every 5 minutes. So like a soap characters can go through some absurd changes but because it makes sense in OZ you get all the fun of seeing a character go through all sorts of amazing changes without it seeming inconsistant or effecting the logic of the story. Oz is finished now after winning lots of awards and viewres in America, shame Channel 4 were too gutless to give it the respect it deserved over here in the UK.

Number 6, where it's important to note that these are in no particular order

Rebecca, my wife. Is that too corny, too schmaltzy, too, dare I say it, obvious? If so I don't care, I can't do a top 10 of things that have meant something to me this last year and not include Rebecca. She's my wife and I love her.
Alan Moore gets a larger post than she does though;)
But then some things shouldn't need that much explaining should they.

At number 7, Alan Moore

If I was doing this chart for 2003, 2002 or all the way back to 1981 then it's likely that somewhere in there would be the name Alan Moore. Let me explain.
Back in the early 80's if you read comics, and a lot of kid's still did, you couldn't avoid the name Alan Moore, he was everywhere. Not like some money crazed hack, but more like a creative dam that had burst. Alan Moore forced his way into the comic industry by bombarding publishers with scripts, some of the first published ones were in 2000ad as 'Future Shocks' (little twist in the tale type stories that ran from 2 pages to 5 pages) He also got work in a new comic starting up called Warrior creating the legends (in the comic world at least) V For Vendetta and Marvelman (Later changed to Miracleman when playground bully Marvel decided to throw it's weight around) Also around that time Moore was working for MarvelUK (oh the irony) doing text stories about a character named Nightraven, reviews and comic strips including the revamped Captain Britain.
Along with V For Vendetta, it was the future shocks that I particularly liked, I still reread them now and they still impress. They show the kind of mind Moore possesses, they're funny, scary, strange, clever and never dull. Later 2000ad replaced Future Shocks with Time Twisters, same format but this time the stories had to be about.... time, of course. Again Alan Moore wrote amazing stories some of which still amaze me today 20 years later (Reversible Man where we follow the life of a man who has just died of a stroke is a work of genius, there's also the story of a man's failed atempt to build a time machine so he can relive happier times that still manages to choke me up) As all this was going on Moore created 2 more titles that I can never forget. Swamp Thing was his first time producing an ongoing comic for the American market, he took a title that was dead in the water and with in a year turned it into the most talked about comic of it's time. Swampthing is where he showed a bigger audience his talent and displayed his remarkable ability for reinventing comic characters. But as much as I love Swamp Thing it was his other title that left it's mark on me, Halo Jones appeared in 2000ad in '84 and blew me away. Sometimes it's hard to know why some effects you so much, it's the same with Halo Jones. The story of a very average girl set in the future we follow her from unemployement to work as a waitress on a space ship to burnt out alcoholic to soldier to freedom. It's an amazing journey and yet I don't know why that first instalment (Halo as an unemployed kid) effected me so much, perhaps it's because it was so terribly human, who knows.
Alan Moore went on to write Watchmen which shook the comic industry to an incredible degree (not all positively), later he wrote From Hell which staggered everyone again (if you've only seen the film you have no idea what From Hell is) and a few years ago he created a line of comics called ABC featuring the excellent League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (which may be forever sullied in the minds of many thanks to the dreadful film) Like David Bowie he's never stood still, every new work is a surprise and like Bowie he's sometimes made the odd mistake and not always been appreciated, taken for granted. We seem to value artists who do the same thing over and over again and then complain when they become dull. But it's not every creator who's willing to take a chance, to risk their success by doing something different, Moore (like Bowie) needs to take that chance, over and over again.
Now Alan Moore is quiting comics, but not really. He'll do what he wants when he feels like it from now on. No doubt he'll do more performance art, a novel, practice magik (he does that too) and maybe if we're lucky he'll do the odd comic.
This rambling trip down memory lane is to illustrate how long I've felt that Moore has been by my side. The thing about comics back then and children's books is that they give the creators the opportunity to influence the minds of the readers to a far greater degree than the creators of adult literature. For better or worst Alan Moore has directly shaped who I am today. He arrived when I needed him and he's never been far away, I've read everything that he's put out and he's rarely let me down. I have to show my thanks somehow don't I? Putting him in my top 10 is the least I can do.

And at number 8

My lovely new iBook. After having a big clunky looking old PC for ages I finally took the plunge and got into debt for a a much more compact and better grown up toy. However I won't turn this into a Mac advert, I just happen to like it and it's proved very handy indeed. Hurrah for my laptop.

Nine

What's the deal with quirky? I dunno, I just like it. 'I 'Heart' Huckabees' is the latest, not the greatest, but still pretty good. 'The Royal Tenenbaums' is the greatest and in good company with 'American Splendour', 'Lost in Translation' and 'Arrested Development'. That's the films (and a tv show), but there's also been some great quirky comics, anything by James Kochalka and Tom Hart and Scott Pilgrim by Brian O'Malley. So, really, what is it about quirky? What I like is something which feels personal and unique, I like something that has sense of humour but isn't just about the laughs. All these quirky stories have great characters that seem real and interesting and not just constructs to further a plot. The plots seem to be there to entertain and push the creator instead of 'making a point'. Interestingly all the examples I've come up with are American (except Scott Pilgrim, Brian O'Malley's Canadian I believe) but I think of quirky as a very British state thanks to classics like Winnie the Pooh and Monty Python, 'Little Britain', 'League of Gentlemen' and 'Black Books' are more modern examples. These all just tickle me in a way 'straight' comedy or drama doesn't always manage. Some of these things have been called 'wilfully quirky', as if that's somehow wrong, should we criticise horror movies for being wilfully scary? Of course not, quirky seems to rub some people up the wrong way, but that's okay, it just means there's a test to find out if someone's got no sense of humour or not.
Next in the top ten..... dunno but you'll all be the first to know.

Number Ten

The outright plagarism continues, sorry Danny. In at number ten is ZOMBIES. What a great time for the zombie. 28 Days Later set the ball rolling in fine style, it owed much to Wyndham (not a bad thing as far as I'm concerned), had a great raw energy to it and like Near Dark was a nice little reinvention. Apart from a few niggles Shaun of the Dead rocked, the Dawn of the Dead remake was excellent (nowhere near as good as the original, but a smart stripped down horror film) and The Walking Dead comics are a wonderful Romero-esque take on zombies.
Some people moaned about fast zombies, but I say when hell is full all sorts of zombies will walk the earth, embrace them all. Anyway, the zombies in Return of the Living Dead had a few moves and it's brilliant.
Next time for number nine, why I like quirky.

Beating myself up for the end of the year

The beginning of a new year is fast approaching and it's time for me to start looking back over this one. There's no need for me to look back over this blog to see what I did or didn't do, I just have to look around me.
A few things were begun but very few of them amounted to anything. The sketch book has laid untouched for a couple of months, the idea of painting didn't get any further than two barely started picture, drawing in general was a wash out. As far as 2004 goes art wise I can't look back on it with pride.
I had hoped to have my own website up and running but after laying it out on paper I got distracted by other things and it ended up being forgotten.
One of my interests of the past six or seven years has been keeping fit and this year saw me at my worst. The main reason for this was a torn muscle which it seems will be a constant source of irritation and occassional pain for a long time. But a fair chunk of the blame rests on my ever weakening shoulders. I'm not in terrible shape at the moment but I've flucuated quite a bit during 04, putting on and losing weight every couple of months. One problem was that once I stopped exercising I stopped eating carefully, when I give up I like to give up all the way.
Saving money has not gone well, some things needed to be bought, a lot of the stuff I could have done without.
Being fairly untidy and scruffy I had hoped I could smarten up a little, only now and again it seems.
Talking too much is a bit of vice too, once I start I can ramble on for ages without ever coming close to saying anything worthwhile. It's not just quantity it's quality, what I lack in one I overcompensate with the other. That's not improved.
That was the bad, but what about the good. Well, there was some.
Good was that even though I got more out of shape I had the sense to keep it under control.
Drawing may not have gone well but I completed my outside responsibilities even when it wasn't in my best interests. I also did manage to keep a sketchbook for a while, something which I've never really done before and not only did I enjoy it but I thought I did some good work.
For all the unfinished and never started projects I did manage to complete the one big one, Simian Smith the first draft, got done and I'm already working my way through the second draft. This one was a real struggle but in doing it I learned a lot.
Balancing it all up I don't think I did great this year, there's more in the minus column than the plus, but the plus column does have one big tick whereas the minuses are mainly small crosses. A lot of my resolutions will be repeats of last years but that was the same as the year before and the one before that, that may sound bad, like I've failed every year, but the truth is that each year has seen me improve a little and in some cases a lot and you can't say fairer than that.

FINISHED!

At just short of 16,000 words the first draft of Simian Smith is complete.
There were times I thought I'd never get to this point and no I'm here I can't tell you how chuffed I am. Whether it ends up being published or not I don't care, I'm happy.

more opinions

I haven't check but I'm guessing there's a lot of folk in computer land who've been having their say about The Incredibles, well I want my say too. It's brilliant. Beautifully designed with more than a nod to 50's and early 60's design. The superheroing aspect is surprisingly, and smartly, kept to a minimum, oh there's fighting and big outrageous peril and flying and so on, but a lot of the action reminded me of spy movies, the kind that have big sets, the early Bond and Flint, even the music seemed to reflect that. CGI is my least favourite animation and I'd like to see less CGI in films in general but the better CG films seem to emulate claymation instead of desperately trying to look 'real' (Polar Express being the latest example of this pointless endeavour), a move that seems to work very well. It's not how it's animated that makes a film great though, it's the script (in animation the scripts have to be in place to a much greater degree than in live action so it's rock solid by the time 'camera's roll' - the lack of respect Hollywood seems to afford the scriptwriter is unbelievable) and it's here that The Incredibles really shines. Pixar create films of wit, inteligence and the creators clearly love what they do. I get the impression that that the people in Pixar are a bunch of smart geeks who can't believe their good luck in getting to do exactly what they want. More me it was the little details that elevate The Incredibles but I won't tell you what they are, go see for yourself.
Sadly the whole thing was nearly spoilt by the trailer for The Magic Roundabout movie. The inclusion of Robbie Williams was enough to break my heart but it looks awful, the makers clearly want to poke my childhood with sharp sticks and permanently tarnish the memory of the original. Shame on them.
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My own work has beening coming on very well, the first draft of Simian Smith is almost finished, in fact it's only a couple of thousand words away. With the end so close my big concerns have finally come to the fore. I'm pretty much happy with the story, it needs work but it's all in place and I like it, but the truth is it's going to be a hard sell, a very hard sell. Pick up a kid's book and there's more than a fair chance that it'll have a kid in it, there might only be one child character in it, but s/he'll be there. The only exception occurring in books where the cast are all animals. There isn't a single kid in my story. As well as it being an obvious homage/pastiche/rip off of old hard boiled crime books it's got a talking ape with no reason given to why he can talk or how he came to exist, he's also the character the reader's got to identify with and he's not a kid. I'm not sure a prospective agent or publisher will get past the synopsis. But I wrote this for me and I honestly believe that kids will like it so what the hell, here's hoping I can change the industry! Failing that I could always try and write some thing about a child magician, wizardor witch, you can't have to many kid's fantasy books.

My pen shines bright as I write my shite

There's a competition to submit a short story that I'm thinking about entering. Obviously the story would be the one I'm working on at the moment as it's my latest one and pressumably when it's all finished up it'll be my best because of it's newness. I've not entered a writing competition before but for reason's not worth going into I've decided this one might be worth a go. Perfect Christmas Present still needs a loot of work but the submition deadline isn't until mid January so it's not a problem. As I'm on a bit of a roll with Simian Smith at the moment (you heard right, the ape is back) it's slowed Pefect Present down but I still think the 1st draft will be done by this week. So as well as putting a story online for criticism I'll actually be send it 'out there', two very good reasons to work hard polishing it up in the 2nd or even 3rd draft.
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Christmas at work is beginning to tire me out even more and the job hunting has stalled slightly simply because it's not the best time of year to leave an old job and start a new one.
Rebecca is once again entertaining thoughts of buying a house and has even seen a couple of fairly nice looking ones in our price range, but she's failed to take into consideration my lack of desire to stay where in Nottingham. So out thoughts go back to trying to move ASAP. Anyone who knows us or has been faithfully reading this blog (a number some where in the thousands I would imagine) will know that we have to stay for two years because of my wife's course and job. To move sooner we'll have to pay off the course fees ourselves, it'll mean we can leave a year early but it might cost a bit. Confusion and no easy answers reign again.

Just beautiful

Outside it's snowing, big white flakes of snow are floating past my lounge window illuminated by the streetlamp. Snow is lying on the grass in the garden and on the trees and bushes and the rooftops. It's cold and beautiful, I love it.

An oh so special treat!

Seeing as the original point of this blog was to be about my atempts at writing and drawing and as I teased with the news that Simian was briefly posted here I thought I'd post a short story I'm working on.
Reader beware! This is not only unfinished it is also a first draft so don't judge it too harshly just yet, rather read it and wait until the next update. Hopefully it'll prove interesting seeing how a story changes from first to second draft, you never know, what seems duff now might prove to be slightly better later.

The Perfect Christmas Present
by
Paul Harrison-Davies

With nowhere else to go and very little to do Raymond Gaines circumstances allowed him ample opportunity to think. Naturally enough Gaines thoughts turned towards his son. The irony was neither appreciated by Gaines nor was it noticed, the truth was that up until recently he had never really thought about his son; if he had perhaps he would not be in his current predicament.
Thoughts of his son led Gaines back to the previous week, to the start of his story.
It was Christmas Eve and Raymond Gaines was cursing loudly in the safety of his car at a young woman trying to vacate her parking space. Slowly slowly the woman tried to manoeuvre her car out of the tight space. It never occurred to Gaines that it was the close proximity of his car to the woman’s car that was makings things so difficult, just as it never occurred to him to move. Impatient and demanding to a fault Gaines saw no reason to move car back out of the way thereby, in his mind, relinquishing his claim on the vacant spot to be.
Scowling in reply to the young woman’s apologetic and embarrassed smile as she finally escaped from her parking prison Gaines pressed firmly down on the accelerator and his car lurched forward into the parking place with an angry growl from the engine and an angry scream from the car bumper.
Taking no responsibility for damaging his own car Gaines stormed away from the car park regretting that he had not had time to get the registration number of the young woman who made him bash his car bumper.
Last minute shoppers filled the city centre to a surprising degree and Gaines marvelled that people could leave their Christmas shopping so late. Of course Gaines himself was doing his own last minute shopping and had no call to criticise the shopping habits of anyone else. Raymond Gaines was the head of a successful business, a business that he had taken over from his father when it was left to him. This was not the case of a spoilt child inheriting an easy ride, this was the case of a spoilt child inheriting a small dying business. Hard work, and an ability to crush anyone in his path with the ease of the truly amoral had seen the business grow into a big business and had seen not grow as a person at all. Normally a member of staff, an elderly woman who had been in his employ as a personal assistant for more years than Gaines could remember, would buy presents for Gaines’ wife, mother or son, unfortunately he had fired the member of staff in question two weeks previous and had neglected to check that the Christmas shopping had been done. Earlier on Christmas Eve Gaines had realised that he had no presents to give his family.
Buying present for his wife and mother was relatively easy, Gaines simply went into the first clothes shop he saw and bought several items of their most expensive clothes guessing the sizes (being careful to err on the small size imagining that if the clothes did not fit then at least it was a flattering mistake) He had no idea if they were good choices but felt sure that if they were not then his wife or Mother would simply exchange the clothes feeling flattered by the size and happy about the price.
Looking at his watch Gaines began to feel frustration, time was short and his son’s present would have to be a little more thoughtful than the purchases he had made for his wife and mother. Gaines had no idea what kind of gift he should get his son because he knew very little about about nine year old boys in general and his son in particular. That the chosen gift had to be the right gift was of great importance, and it was here that Gaines was stabbed with a slight pang of regret at his hasty firing of the old woman. With a mental shrug the pang regret was cast aside, the woman was far to old and her recent bout of ill health made it necessary to get rid of her, simple nostalgia was no reason to keep the failing assistant in his employ and if the fabrication of missing reports and files had to used to allow him to legally fire her then he felt no guilt in fabricating them. No guilt at all. But the problem was that the woman, who clearly had no son of her own, had paid particular attention to the presents bought for Gaines' young boy. Every Christmas and every birthday the boy unwrapped a present that gave great joy and delight, at the time it had been greatly appreciated by Gaines as the boy was normally sullen and uncommunicative, although this behaviour was only in evidence to his father, everyone else found the boy to be bright attentive and just a little melancholy, as benefits one who is in need of fatherly support but who receives nothing but cold disinterest. Gaines’ son hung on to the hope that his father did indeed love him as evidenced by the gifts he sometimes received, for the gifts were not just expensive they were thoughtful and interesting. That these gifts seemed to undo the damage, however briefly, that Gaines was thoughtlessly causing was apparent even to Gaines himself.
Shoppers did there best to walk past Gaines as he stood in the middle of the pavement waiting for inspiration, inevitably the would bump into him and he would curse loudly at them. Some apologised, most ignored the man and a select few surprised themselves by not hitting him, something about Gaines high handed arrogant manner seemed to cause even the most aggressive man to shrink back. raymond Gaines had long been a master of intimidation.
Time was running out so Gaines fell back upon one of his usual techniques, the exploitation of others. A brisk walk further up the street and over a zebra crossing led him into one of the city’s shopping centres. Grey and ugly with scant regard for aesthetic pleasure the centre looked like any other. Inside the shopping centre was a large department store it was here that Gaines hoped to find some sort of acceptable gift for his son.
Moving swiftly through the several floors of clothing, kitchen utensils and appliances, televisions, stereos, garden furniture and equipment, household furniture and ornaments,stationary, jewellery and perfumes Gaines finally found an area given over to children’s toys.
Alarmingly short of customers Gaines knew time was short and the store would soon be closing, he needed to find a shop assistant someone who he could transfer the responsibility of choosing his son’s present onto. Seeing the red polo shirted uniform of the store assistant Gaines made haste.
“You there,” bellowed Gaines unnecessarily, “I need assistance.”
The short hunched figure turned round revealing himself to be a man well past middle age with a full head of hair which had grown thin and wispy so that in it’s length it floated in the slightest breeze undulating as if it was some strange exotic underwater plant swaying with the ebb and flow of the sea. Beneath the almost hypnotic hair shone a pair of eyes that held Gaines with a piercing clarity that they gave him the impression that he was being appraised in such a complete and total manner that he felt a dread wave of nausea and a weakening of the knees. Shaking off the alien and invasive feeling Gaines once again attempted to gain the upper hand.
“I am short of time and must have a suitable gift for my son.”
“Of course Sir,” replied the elderly assistant, “and what can you tell me of your son?”
It was an simple question, and given the circumstances more than appropriate, it was also spoken with polite courtesy yet it seemed to Gaines that the man was mocking him, it seemed that implicit with every carefully chosen word the man was slapping Gaines whom he saw as so much dirt to be scraped from his shoe.
‘I.... He is, is a normal average young boy of nine.”
Once again the frank stare of the old man seemed to appraising Gaines’ words and once again it seem that as the man spoke he was judging Gaines and that once again that judgement was damning.
“An average normal boy?”

......and there we take our leave of this 'macabre' tale, if you want to find out how it ends keep dropping by.

Blink and you missed it

If you happened to be looking at my blog last night or ealy this morning you would have been able to see the first draft of the unfinished Simian Smith story. My Ibook is proving a bit difficult in terms of setting up a new email account and reacieving emails so as I can get online with it I posted up my story online and then copied it onto the Mac. Not exactly the most secure way of doing things but it was quick easy and I doubt anyopne was looking anyway.
Blogging's becoming a bit tiresome as I struggle to do other things as well as struggle to have an interesting life or at least an interesting take on life. I still like the idea of blogging and will continue to do it but the entries will be more, like the title suggests, infrequent and random.

Retail therapy

Bought an IBook today with new printer and I'm quite chuffed. Not really being able to afford it takes the shine off things but what the hell.